Adam Sandler May Once Again Ruin My Life

And so it sets upon me, emerging from the darkest craters of the streaming landscape and rising high, blocking out the sun, blocking out the very essence of hope, and blanketing my life with an unescapable shadow.  Mortality cannot save me from this fate, a promise of peers, a promise that rests on me the albatross.  Without ability to inhale, all constricts my shell, bringing me down to the bare framework of existence and beckoning my lack of certainty in identity and fate.  I am a victim of that which I have fed myself, the beast that I let loose to destroy and tear asunder.  Weeping and gnashing of teeth...

Yep, it is the time of year to review Netflix's annual Adam Sandler movie, The Week Of.  Ever since he entered into the unholy union with the streaming giant I have had to watch and review a new Adam Sandler film since December 11, 2015.  It kicked off with The Ridiculous 6, which I gave a very rare zero star rating.  The movie did everything it could do to snag that rating, and it wasn't the fist Happy Madison to get the zero star.  Bucky Larson nailed that one.  In 2016, it was the action comedy The Do-Over.  I think it may have had action, but I can assure you that it did not have comedy.  Half star for that one.  And last year it was Sandy Wexler.  While my podcast co-host Christopher gave it a massive two stars (thanks to the performance from Jennifer Hudson, who I agreed was magnetic), I could only be bothered to give this incredibly annoying character, along with Rob Schneider once again giving us a racially stereotypical performance, half a star.  Three films and a cumulative score of one star out of four.

This isn't something new to Netflix.  Sandler has been delivering a mean-spirited brand of comedy for a long time, settling for scripts that make the third Austin Powers movie look like a revelation.  My favourite of his movies lately was Pixels, but we can thank Peter Dinklage for that.  Every now and then we get a reminder that he is actually super talented when he blesses us with performances like he did in Meyerowitz Stories (New and Selected).  Leading into the deal with Netflix, Sandler had put out near offensive efforts acting or writing in movies like Jack and Jill, and Bucky Larson: Born to be a Star.

I really don't want to write Sandler off, but he has an absolutely horrid track record.  His films go for the easiest jokes possible, rely on cameos to a level similar to Zoolander 2, insults people who look different, and includes Herculean product placements and advertisements for companies.  I'm not asking for anything sophisticated.  I enjoy goofy humour, but it needs to be based off of something.  It can't just be scenes with kids peeing on things or kids swearing.  That's not a joke in itself, yet Sandler treats it that way.  His sense of humour is so base that native American actors left the set of Ridiculous 6.  It is also the sense of humour that had Schneider in brown face for some reason in that movie.

It could be my own fault that I have to watch and review the latest Sandler movie.  I may have said that all Netflix originals would be reviewed for The Movie Breakdown podcast.  I obviously wasn't thinking about what exactly that would mean at the time.  I want Sandler to prove me wrong.  He has the ability to do so, but he doesn't seem to put forth the effort when an easy stroll is all that's needed to fulfill his obligations.  I must do what I need to, and I hope that I will have a good time.  History tells me that the odds are against me.  I am thinking the run time will make a mockery of me and I will lose part of my sanity in this endeavour.

REVIEW: Kung Fury

Trapped in the mind of every cinema-freak man child of the 1980s movie scene is a kaleidoscope of tropes, scenes, and sequences that typified the decade but never dared to pair along side one another in a single film.  Well the impossible has now come to life in David Sandberg's Kickstarter funded short film, Kung Fury.  It may only clock in at half an hour, but it is more homage packed and crammed full of action than anything from the library of Chuck Norris.  That's right, I went there.

Sandberg stars in the film as a cop who has been imbued with ancient Kung Fu powers after being simultaneously struck by lightning and bitten by a cobra.  He fulfills the long held prophecy as the one who will bring the most awesome techniques of the martial art into form, and the mean streets of Miami are all the safer because of it.  He must deal with having a new partner as well as travelling too far back in time, to an era where raptors shoot lasers out of their eyes, to conquer the biggest threat to both Kung Fu and society.

While the film is a complete joke, it is a joke with terrific energy and a great example on the micro scale of correct story telling.  The whole thing is a gimmick, and the smartest side of Sandberg comes out in never playing on one gag for two long and maximizing the script for the half hour run time.  There was a hope that it would be created into a feature film if it had gathered one million dollars from its Kickstarter campaign, but I think missing that mark was to its benefit.  Keep the jokes and references quick, keep them concise, and then cram the audience in a Lamborghini Countach and launch us towards the next one.

It is this precision that not only makes the film keep from getting stale, but makes it watchable.  After the first few gags, while I did most hearty a chuckle, I wondered if it was possible for it to keep it up for a half hour without me getting bored.  Most definitely it does, is the answer.  Heads explode, Thor wields awesome pectorals, and vikings ride giant wolves while carrying mini-guns.

There is also a charisma to the performance of Sandberg's that keeps it interesting.  He plays a cop that is a loose cannon and is too cool for school, talking in the menacing monotone voice that was popularized by Clint Eastwood.  It's not particularly easy to mimic that style and still have personality.  Just look as far as Adam Sandler's performance in The Ridiculous 6 to see how easy it is to cock up such a style and make it boring as hell.

If you don't lay in bed at night dreaming of all the cliches of 1980s cinema, mostly the love for cop movies and martial arts films, then there is a decent chance that you may ask what the hell was so special about Kung Fury.  It is probably best to just take a pass on it, if that sounds like you.  However, if the trailer posted below revs your engine to the redline of excitement, then get off your ass and check out the movie.  I promise that you won't be disappointed.

Rating - 3.5 out of 4 stars